A Thought
I've had occasion to talk to many of my female friends today, both blogging friends and analog world friends. The theme for the day seems to be doubt about what they have to offer the men in their lives or the men they want in their lives. I wouldn't presume to speak for all men, but I will share my thoughts and you can look around at the people you know and have known to gauge their accuracy.
What can you offer us (aside from sex, obviously) that we want and need? The same thing that women have given us since time began, you can offer us *hope*. We like hope, we need hope. We'll travel thousands of miles on hope. You've seen guys do it, hang onto a something that's all but dead because they still have hope. We'll fight until the last breath if we have that. The worst thing you can do to us is take away our hope. That's what breaks us in the end. If you want to see your man move a mountain, let him have his hope.
What can you offer us (aside from sex, obviously) that we want and need? The same thing that women have given us since time began, you can offer us *hope*. We like hope, we need hope. We'll travel thousands of miles on hope. You've seen guys do it, hang onto a something that's all but dead because they still have hope. We'll fight until the last breath if we have that. The worst thing you can do to us is take away our hope. That's what breaks us in the end. If you want to see your man move a mountain, let him have his hope.
posted by pitfinder at 7:56 PM
3 Comments:
I'm always offering hope. I think Matt would like more reality *wink wink*
hrm..interesting perspective.
I don't think I've found this so much. I've come across a lot of men who get so easily rejected that they can't even stand up to the idea of hope. Use it as an idol to allay fears and overcome disappointment and disbelief.
What I want from a man, more than anything else, is a buddy.
Someone who I work in with well, and someone who let's me be me, and is ok with that. Even excited by that.
I am less interested in what they need.
I have spent most of my life worrying about that and in the end I disappear and forget who I am. Ultimately they wake up one day and ask themselves, who the hell is that and what happened to that spunky girl I fell in love with.
I can only be who I am and hope that that is enough. Which is now what I expect from them.
hmmmm....
Suze makes a good point, you keep trying to figure out what they need and how to make them happy. Sooner than latter the girl they fell in love is not there any more.
I like the idea of giving hope, as long as you keep your own person in tact.
On the good note I think I've found somebody who doesn't ask for more than I should give. At least at this time he's not letting me give more than I should, weird thing is it makes me feel great.
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