Bridge Over Troubled Water

When you're weary, feeling small,
When tears are in your eyes, I will dry them all;
I'm on your side, when times get rough
And friends just can't be found,
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down.
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down.

When you're down and out,
When you're on the street,
When evening falls so hard
I will comfort you,
I'll take your part,
When darkness comes
And pains is all around,
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down.
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down.

Sail on silvergirl,
Sail on by.
Your time has come to shine.
All your dreams are on their way.
See how they shine.
If you need a friend
Im sailing right behind.
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will ease your mind.
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will ease your mind.


----------
Paul Simon

EE&V

Eyes
In the edge of a cloud of gritty concrete dust.
Ears
Everything muffled except the painful ringing.
Voice
"What the hell were you thinking?"

"I wasn't. I just pushed the button."





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Too many stupid people, not enough bullets.

I think I'm gonna steal this and make a regular feature out of it. (lol) :-)

Q:You're trapped in an elevator with Gehgis Kahn, Adolf Hitler, and a lawyer. You have a gun with two bullets, what do you do?

A:Shoot the lawyer twice.


Today in 1950, the answering machine was invented. And there was much rejoicing.

Today is also Crush a Can Day.

Don't forget, tomorrow is Ask a Stupid Question Day!

Here's Joan

She's a rock star, formerly of the Runaways and then Joan Jett and the Blackhearts.

Here's a start, if you're interested.





Today's rant.

Somebody senk me a link to one of those 'meet people' sites because he thought the girl was hot. So I looked.

She says she's recently married and just looking to meet new people and make friends. Yeah? So why did you post pictures of yourself in your underwear? Just exactly what kind of 'friends' did you think this would bring? If you really wanted friends, you've just told the kind of people who'd make good friends that you're either stupid or dishonest. Maybe both.

And while we're talking, does the new husband know you're posting nearly naked pictures of yourself on the net to meet new people? Is he cool with that?

End rant.

Monday Miscellaneous

Joan Jett was just on TV. She still looks good, so I had to look up her info online. Turns out she's 48. Wow.

I heard a thing I liked today. Some Representative was on the babble box talking politics, didn't really listen to it all, but she said "The Whitehouse has become an evidence free zone". (grin)

It's National Pancake Day, people. Where's the syrup? Blueberries? All that stuff.

Tomorrow is Crush A Can Day, and then we have my favorite, Ask A Stupid Question Day!

So warm up those questions, yeah?




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Annoying Drops

I like my ISP overall, but there are days like today where their machines keep dropping the connection that are very irratating. Kind of makes my want to save up the huge initial fee to go DSL with the competition. (I'm not, I'm just complaining.)


But on the bright side, tomorrow is National Comic Book Day!


Had to pop back in and add something.
Has anyone noticed the message you get while posting that says, "This may take a moment if you have a large blog." Is it just me or does that sound like something you'd hear in Las Vegas?

Sing Along (come on, you know you want to)

I'm Popeye the Sailor Man,
I'm Popeye the Sailor Man.
I'm strong to the finich
Cause I eats me spinach.
I'm Popeye the Sailor Man.

I'm one tough Gazookus
Which hates all Palookas
Wot ain't on the up and square.
I biffs 'em and buffs 'em
And always out roughs 'em
But none of 'em gets nowhere.

If anyone dares to risk my "Fisk",
It's "Boff" an' it's "Wham" un'erstan'?
So keep "Good Be-hav-or"
That's your one life saver
With Popeye the Sailor Man.

I'm Popeye the Sailor Man,
I'm Popeye the Sailor Man.
I'm strong to the finich
Cause I eats me spinach.
I'm Popeye the Sailor Man.

"Rambling Brains"

I put this into Google and got 11 results, some of which were repeats, leaving only five. I'm a little dissapointed.

Today is, appropriately enough, Dogs In Politics Day. Kind of makes you want to go to the UN in New York and see who's peeing on the hydrants. :-)


What's the difference between a hooker and a lawyer?
The hooker will stop screwing you when you die.




Have a good weekend, folks!

Brain Ramblings

By the time I get this posted it will be Hobbit Day. I don't know if it's National or International.
I also don't know exactly how one is supposed to celebrate Hobbit day since they don't really exist.

Anybody out there know anything about vacuforming? How thick can the material be and how extreme can the shape be? (Okay, it's kind of a rhetorical question and I'll go look it up tomorrow.)

I'm going to have to see how much banannas cost, because some of those dessert ideas sound pretty tasty. :-)

I'm discovering that the vast majority of websites out there don't give a tinker's damn whether they validate correctly or not. Many don't even have a doctype declaration. At all. Zip, nada. Oh, well, they never said we could outlaw stupidity. (I'd be in there from time to time myself.)

International Hi-jinks

Hugo Chavez called our President 'The Devil'.

Wait for it.

Hear that?

Me neither. I don't hear anybody arguing with him. :-)


It's kind of a weird feeling when the crazy guy who runs Iran sounds more articulate and rational than the guy who runs our country.



For the folks down under, as we go towards one season and you head for the other, do you think there'll be a day where we have the same weather (more or less)?


Remember, tomorrow is the International Banana Festival. (No, I don't know where they hold this, or if they even do.) :-)





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Just For Fun

I thought these were kind of fun. Yeah, I 'borrowed' the images, but since I'm including a LINK to the site where they came from so everybody can shop there, I figure they can't be too mad. (Yeah, I know the shipping would be high for some of you - sorry.)

Silly People

It's becomming more and more clear to me that many people in big business don't get it.
The DRM folks astound me. The more they try to crack down, the more it becomes a challenge. You can't increase your customer base by treating regular people as criminals before they've done anything. Well, okay Canada can. But that came back to bite 'em in the ass.

There are some folks out there who've figured out the obvious. Some of them a while ago. Go Here for more. These people understood how things are changing in 1999.

How is it that business still isn't listening to their customers when they try to tell them what they want?

Beats the daylights out of me.





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Some Junk

How come useful stuff dissapears from the web faster than I can organize my bookmarks and crap like THIS won't die?

Remember, tomorrow is National Play-doh Day, and then it's National Butterscotch Pudding Day!

This is also the 42nd anniversary of the premiere of Gilligan's Island.

Or, if you get really bored, you can go to jihad.net. It's not what you might think at first.

Unreal People

What's the deal with TV characters who have blogs and the like as if they were real people? And who fills in for the fictional? The actor? The writers?
Is there somebody out there who thinks these are real people, and is that healthy?

Anybody Know The Play?

Doubt thou the stars are fire;
Doubt that the sun doth move;
Doubt truth to be a liar;
But never doubt I love.

-Shakespeare

I figured it was about time for some Iambic Pentameter.


I saw a thing today that made me chuckle. I was in the local big box store just trying to get across the building. There were people with carts stopped in the aisle blocking it so they could chat. (Don't get me started.) So I went cross-country through the clothing area. There I saw a bra that I think you could actually put soccer balls in. The brand name is what I found funny, the tag read "Sweet Nothings". Really?

I will fight no more...

"I am tired of fighting. Our chiefs are killed. Looking Glass is dead. Toohulhulsote is dead. The old men are all dead. It is the young men who say yes or no. He who led the young men is dead.

It is cold and we have no blankets. The little children are freezing to death. My people, some of them, have run away to the hills and have no blankets, no food. No one knows where they are--perhaps freezing to death.

I want to have time to look for my children and see how many I can find. Maybe I shall find them among the dead.

Hear me, my chiefs. I am tired. My heart is sick and sad. From where the sun now stands, I will fight no more forever."

- Chief Joseph of the Nez Perce, 1877

It's Time

I don't know how we get out of this war thing, experts don't seem to know. But I think it's time we, the people, started hearing some kind of plan. No more "stay the course" crap unless you can tell us what the course IS.
When the Iraqis are ready to take over - yeah, that's not happening.
So, come on, national leaders, let's hear something that sounds like you folks don't have your heads ALL the way up your asses.


Sorry, just had to get that rant out.


Don't forget what tomorrow is. (Hint: donuts)

Let's Go

I don't remember where this was, but I could go there for a day or two.

Who's in?






121,39679

Life Sucks

I had this good idea one the way home, and then the TV reminded me that this is the 5th anniversary of the World Trade Center going down. I almost didn't write this because I thought it might seem like just another 9/11 thing. (Like mass media has been doing for days now.) That's not what it's about, but it does seem oddly appropriate. So anyway..

I was standing in an almost empty parking lot between rain showers talking to one of my (local) friends. We found ourselves puzzling over another's behavior of late. As we tried to figure out what it might be, we bagan to realize it wasn't just that guy, it was us too. Why is that?
"It seems like everthing is bad and there's nothing we can do."

Yeah.

We're in a war in Iraq that doesn't seem to have any resolution in sight.
Let's not forget we still have troops in Afghanistan, and that should have been settled a long time ago.
TV keeps telling me the economy is getting better. Mine's not. I don't see that.
You can't go into public buildings with keys in your pocket. Don't even start me on airports.
Sounds like our leaders would like to throw some troops into Iran.
Even if all our troops could come home tomorrow, the cost will linger for a long time.
Our system does have checks and balances. We can vote people out. Two years from now. A lot of bad stuff can happen in two years.
The people in charge don't want scrutiny, so they point fingers at everybody else. Illegal immigrants. Gay marriage. Those evil scientists who want to do stem cell research to save lives.
Our reputation as a nation is in the toilet. We've thrown patience and tolerance out the window.
Then we had Katrina. More bad stuff. Bungling. Ineptitude. Those people still haven't got lives.
Nobody seems to know where Osama Bin Laden could be.
The Brits are doing a better job protecting our nation than we are.
We torture prisoners. In secret locations.
We spy on regular, law-abiding citizens. (The courts are saying it's illegal.)
I could go on.

But it's that last part the really twists the knife. "There's nothing we can do."
I'm not happy about where my country is going, how it's behaving, and I can't do much about it. I can (and will) vote when it's time. It doesn't seem like enough.

"Government of the people, by the people, and for the people..." I take those words pretty seriously.

So I decided I'm going to do what I *can* do. I'm going to take a step back, a deep breath, and try to ease up a little. I'm going to try to relax, be patient, be nicer to people and to myself. I'm going to spend more of my energy trying to have some fun. It seems like I haven't laughed for more than a minute or two at a time since.....too long.

Fun is good. So let's get this party started.
Thanks to all of you who read this meager blog and comment on it. Especially those of you in and from other countries, it gives a sense of perspective that I value.

So who out there needs a kind word or a virtual hug? Turns out I still have some left. :-)

Five Years Ago

Here's a list of all the people who died on September 11th.

You may not want to look around the rest of the site if you're feeling this anniversary strongly since it's called 'Caskets on Parade' and they seem to be giving prizes if you can predidct when famous people will die.

I'm also a little curious about MSU being the host for this thing.

Roadkill?

One of my friends drives a truck. Not a delivery van. A truck. Eighteen wheels, enough fuel to heat a house, that kind. We were talking today about how tempting it can be to just 'deal' with some of the jerks and bad drivers out there.

Not that anybody would, but I thought it might be worth a mention to all the idiots on the roads out there so they know just how close they are to having fifty thousand pounds of metal roll over them. Maybe a little more curtesy is in order? Is it that hard to act like a grownup?

(end rant)

Just The Food Ones

September 14 is National Cream-filled Donut Day.
The 17th is National Apple Dumpling Day.
The 19th is National Butterscotch Pudding Day.
The 20th is National Punch Day.
The 21st is The International Banana Festival.
The 26th is National Pancake Day.
The 29th is Poisoned Blackberries Day.


I don't know if that last one really qualifies as a food.... :-)





295,39648

Brainless Again

Judging from the 10.4 million results you get when you put the phrase "ate my brain" into Google, the whole world is sharing a colloction of about twelve brains.

Really, it would explain a whole lot of strange behavior. :-)



Oh, and tomorrow is National Date Nut Bread Day. (Is this where I say, 'I rest my case'?)





477,39353

Moronic

I just read that four years ago a top aide to the Canadian Prime Minister had to resign from her job because it leaked out that she had refered (privately) to President Bush as a 'moron'.
How much longer before Canada gives her job back? And maybe a medal.

This guy has written ten times more signing statements than all other Presidents combined. Should we just print the Constitution on toilet paper?






494,38876

Can I Be An Orc?

Some days I just want to be brainless and follow the crowd. A little mayhem and destruction can really brighten up a dull day. It's a perfect excuse to be inarticulate and behave badly to anyone for any reason. Hygine goes right out the window. Kill something and eat it.

No moral issues, no political discussions, no indepth discussions of things I don't care about. Kill something and eat it. Grunt. Scratch. Sleep.

Sounds good to me.

Now where did I put my axe?




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Labor Day

Yes, it's Labor Day. It started in 1882 and nobody can seem to agree on who's idea it was. Over time it's become less about Labor and more about marking the end of summer.

So, yeah, it's one of those artificial holidays where banks and the government are closed and everything else is a crap shoot. Yippie.







548,37341

Crikey Steve

I heard today that Steve Irwin got a stingray barb in the chest and died.

I didn't really know that much about the guy, just what I saw on TV. He was pretty easy to make fun of, but never seemed to mind or take it personally. And he always seemed to have a youthful enthusiasm and energy that was hard not to like.
I hope his wife and two kids will be okay (eventually) without him around.

So long, Mate.

Hand Signals

We've got the wave. It's friendly, it says 'hello', 'nice to see you', that sort of thing. We have a lot of gestures for all sorts of unpleasant things (I probably don't need to list them here).

But what about when you pull to a stop and get distracted, fishing for something you dropped a block back, checking to see if you have cash in your wallet, or whatever, and then notice that somebody is now behind you, waiting for you to get going? Why don't we have a universal hand gesture that says 'oh, sorry about that'? Some way to let people know you weren't being intentionally rude while you get out of the way?

Maybe there is one and I just haven't heard. (I'm often the last to know about these things.)

Any ideas?

Well, Why Not?

There are now Norse Pastafarians. I might be able to get behind that movement, thought somebody would have to convince me that global warming is what they think it is and not what somebody else thinks it isn't.

Okay, just use a search engine if you really care what kind of silliness this is all about. :-)

Just Replies And Stuff

Lynn, thanks! Welcome to the madness. :-)
(Are you in C-U or maybe the Mad City? It would explain the hitcounter lately.)


earthkissed, speaking of procrastinating.....:-)

jenna, h0w (4n 1 f0r61v3 5p3||1n6 |1k3 7h47
(how can I forgive spelling like that) in leet speak. It's a toy. I can do morse code too. Or binary. Or hex. :-)

Jade, the numbers? What numbers? I don't see any numbers down there. (acts all innocent)
Okay, busted. It's a word count so 'somebody' can keep after me to make sure I keep working. That third book won't write itself. The first number is the daily count and the second is the running total.


Like this:
271,36793



What book? you ask?
Put this phrase into Google, keep the quotes, you should get me.

"It's like poking a badger with a sharp stick."